Welcome AloneinOH. I'd like to think you are not alone anymore, you are here.
Many people here have been thru the samething. Hang onto your hat, it's going to be a bumpy ride of emotions. I think you will lose alot of the guilt you have been carrying around with you. I know I did. I was out for almost 30 years when I found this board, and still carried a strange guilt around. Not anymore. Please keep reading things from people who have been there and regroup before you proceed. That way you can see how others have faired with their choices on handling what they found out. Slower seems to cause the least amount of damage in the long run, especially if you want salvage any family ties.
I was raised in the Cincinnati area.